Coming to NBC next fall: Nurse Baby

[We post a lot of articles here at Destructoid. The endless, ouroboros news cycle has us burning the snake at both ends, which will ultimately push big news, thoughtful original pieces, and all sorts of other great content off of the front page. Check here every Saturday for my attempt to rectify that.]

The jellyfish havecontinued their encroach. They worked their way through the sewer system en masse and before we knew it we were overrun. They squished through pipes, came up toilets, clogged the treatment plants, and flooded the streets out of the manholes. Our time is over. Our resilience doesn’t rate. The jellies are immortal and indomitable.

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Tell my wife and son I love them.

ORIGINAL CONTENT

Why Titanfall won’t be my next big gaming obsession– Brett Makedonski

Last week, Hamza “Muscle Milk” Aziz explained whyTitanfallwould behis next gaming obsession. Brett “Tender Lovin'” Makedonski thought it would be wise to tell his boss why he’s wrong and howTitanfall totally sucks(for him).

A battle scene in Battlefield 6 Open Beta

There were even a fair number of occasions that had me temporarily thrilled. The first time I used the mech successfully to take down several opponents was supremely rewarding. The same goes for the lives where I would rodeo to destroy many titans and rack up big points. However, these moments were fleeting.

Very Quick Tips for the Titanfall beta– Chris Carter

Maybe Brett didn’t convince youTitanfallsucks. But maybe you suck at it. Chris “John Travolta” Carter can fix you.

‘ve been playing a ton of theTitanfallbeta, and I think I’ve started to get a handle on how things work as both a pilot and a Titan. Since a lot of readers out there have asked for a collection of tips to help them skyrocket to the top of the leaderboards, here’s a quick guide on how to kick ass and fall some Titans.

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Media Molecule on the challenges of making Tearaway– Dale North

If you didn’t buyTearaway, you’re atearableperson. Seriously. It is the best game I played last year. And no one bought it. Anyway, Dale “Nurse Doctor” North interviewed its lead, Rex Crowle. Go read. Then buyTearawayif you haven’t.

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‘I think what’s fun is seeing how we gradually subverted what someone might think they’re getting. I think a lot of people have been surprised, thinking it’s the kind of you know, the old THQ or Disney tie-in. It’s got kind of a young appeal to it. And actually, when they start playing, they’re like whoa.’

The Order: 1886: Gritty, cinematic eye candy– Dale North

Ready at Dawn impressed me with how under wraps it keptThe Order: 1886. They’ve finally showed off a bit of it and Dale “Puma Thrower” North was there to tell you all about it. It’s filmic and cover-based third-person shooter-y. Next gen!

Even in this early state, The Order: 1886is stunning with its filmic look. The PS4 is providing enough muscle for realistic visuals, but it’s the dust and grit that bring a realistic authenticity to its visuals. Ready at Dawn says that they used virtual lenses differently than you’d normally use in a game, and it definitely shows. Pans and cuts work to help to tell the story, much like they would in a film. The look is quite different than a typical third-person adventure, where the shots are always wide and everything is always in focus.

A snap of the upcoming MESA update in PEAK

Chroma: A musical first-person shooter from Harmonix— Dale North

Harmonix, makers ofRock Band, is making a new game. It’s a free-to-play first-person shooter that is music based. “What?” is right. Let Dale “Circular Incision” North explain.

Music is also deeply tied to the shooter mechanics. For most of the weapons ofChroma, you’re free to fire at any time. But hitting the right beats or staying on rhythm will bring power and accuracy bonuses, and some actions can only occur on beats. For example, the assault class sub-machine gun needs to be clicked on the beat to reload. The grenade launcher can be fired at will, but it’ll only detonate on the downbeat of any given measure. The engineer class is probably the most musical; it features aRock Band-style HUD that has the player clicking the mouse buttons to line up with the song’s beat markers to fire properly. The engineer’s gun actually won’t fire off beat.

Naked Snake sneaking around in MGS Delta.

HOTTEST, SLIMIEST NEWS OF THE WEEK

DOOM 4 beta, Yokai Watch & Final Fantasy on PC– Max Scoville

Hey everybody, I’m back from Japan! And here’s your quasi-timely news update for the first two thirds of this week. Irrational Gamesclosed, pre-orderingWolfenstein: The New Ordergets you a beta for the new and technically unannouncedDOOMgame. Square Enix has trademarked“Shinra Company,”there’s a possibility of newFinal Fantasygames on PCin the future, and in the meantime, Final FantasiesVII, VIII, andXIVare currently on sale.

Battlefield 6 aiming RPG at a helicopter

Whoa: Irrational Games as we know it is shutting down– Jordan Devore

‘I am winding down Irrational Games as you know it,’ wrote co-founder Ken Levinein a postthat comes as an utter shock. ‘I’ll be starting a smaller, more entrepreneurial endeavor at Take-Two. That is going to mean parting ways with all but about fifteen members of the Irrational team.’

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The ‘extremely popular’ Lightning may return (again)– Steven Hansen

‘For Lightning, her story ends here inLightning Returns: Final Fantasy XIII, as this game is meant as a finale to this series,’ Toriyama explains. ‘But we know that Lightning is an extremely popular character, even when compared to otherFinal Fantasycharacters. So there is a possibility that Lightning would appear in other futureFinal Fantasytitles, not as a protagonist, but as a guest character.’

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Not this again: Thief is 900p on Xbox One, 1080p on PS4– Chris CarterMGS V: Ground Zeroes is 720p on XB1, 1080p on PS4– Chris Carter

Can’t wait until we stop caring about this so we don’t have to do this dance every time.

Milla Jovovich portraying Alice in Resident Evil 2002, wearing a red dress and holding a gun in her hand.